Being Brave; Strengths over Weaknesses
This blog is about identifying our strengths and leaning into them vs focusing on our weaknesses to improve them. We all have unique qualities and strengths. What if we focused our time and energy into expanding our natural gifts than improving our weaknesses? I was inspired to write this blog after reading one of Ina Garten’s books, listening to a Will Ferrel interview and watching the We Are the World documentary.
I highly recommend Ina Garten’s book, Be Ready When the Luck Happens. Ina is also known as The Barefoot Contessa, and I love watching her cooking shows. She is so personable you feel like you are right there in her kitchen with her. In this book, Ina shared her struggle with self-esteem stemming from a difficult childhood. She shares how she grew into her confidence, talents, and trusting her instincts to lean into a career doing what she loves with the encouragement of a strong support network, especially her husband.
A few weeks ago on my commute, I came across a Will Ferrell interview discussing his early comedy career days. He shared a story of when he first joined the Saturday Night Live cast, he was also filming or had filmed movies such as Old School, Anchorman and Elf. At that time, he was not confident the movies, which now have become iconic, would be picked up by producers or even released. Although Will has become an entertainment superstar, he reflected that he flubbed his very first line on SNL on live television. It is crazy to me that he has achieved so much success, he still clearly remembers that one mistake on SNL.
In the “We Are the World” The Greatest Night in Pop documentary, music icons such as Lionel Riche, Huey Lewis, Cyndi Lauper were interviewed about the event. The artists shared as much as they were honored to be part of the project because of the mission, the pressure to perform solos while being also being filmed for the music video was immense with so many successful artists in the same room.
Hearing that these talented people who are household names struggle with imposter syndrome, making mistakes, self-confidence, and their perceived weaknesses is something a lot of us also struggle with also. I especially hear this often from women who doubt and downplay their gifts or constantly compare themselves to others.
Thinking of my own childhood, report card time was stressful. It did not matter how much I may have excelled in some areas, any subjects that showed marks of average or needs improvement were scrutinized. Growing up, the focus was traditionally on my weaknesses and what I could do better, not my strengths. I realize that constructive criticism can be helpful but ultimately, we cannot all be good at everything. We all have different strengths that make us unique. We should appreciate them and share these strengths and talents.
If you have not taken the Gallups Strengths Finder, this is an excellent assessment to invest in. Through answering a series of questions, your top 5 strengths are identified. My top 5 are Intellection, Discipline, Empathy, Learner, and Focus. A friend and fellow consultant is certified in the Gallup Assessments for coaching her clients. I asked her thoughts about how early strengths start appearing and she said strengths can begin showing as early as elementary school ages. Gallup does offer a survey instrument called Strengths Explorer for 3rd to 8th grade students that although is not the full 50 strength topics in the adult assessment, this will identify the top 3 out of 10 talents.
So, I was curious. Knowing my strengths through the Gallup assessment as an adult, what if I looked at my old report cards and transcripts and possibly job evaluations through a different perspective? I still have some school report cards and mementos in storage from my elementary through college days. What areas or subjects did I excel in? What positive comments did my teachers say about my skills? How does that feedback line up with my known strengths as an adult?
My report cards showed I always earned great grades in Reading, English, Social Studies, Spelling, Science and Art. I was not so strong in Math, Accounting, Chemistry and Handwriting. What was most interesting though were the teachers comments. I had challenges listening to and following directions. I daydreamed often. I should proof my work and make more effort to turn in neat work. Even more interesting were comments that I put too much pressure on myself, I should not be afraid to make mistakes, I worked well independently, and that I struggled with self-confidence and self-esteem. Some of these are still true today.
In high school and college, I had earned several scholarships and awards for outstanding new member, achievement, loyalty and leadership in the groups and teams I was part of. In a 1998 DISC profile through my work, I was a high S for Steadiness-cooperating with others to carry out tasks and C for Conscientiousness, working within circumstances to ensure quality and accuracy. I was very low in D for Dominance and I for Influence. The recommendation for any of my managers was that I would work best in an environment where I knew expectations, had documented procedures, and was aware of how I would be evaluated so I could ensure I met my goals.
Wow…. Spot. On. When I reflect on what motivates me, I always need a goal to work toward--either a milestone, mission, or some sort of inventive to earn such as a bonus. I am not motivated by recognition. I hate the spotlight but still want to be a leader in my actions. I am still observant and want to be transparent about goals and expectations but strive to be diplomatic. I like dealing with facts, processes, and documentation, although as I get older, I am learning to lean into my intuition much more. I love to learn and although I do like to know expectation boundaries, I also like to know where I can be creative and add my own stamp to my work. I miss using my imagination and being creative. I wonder at one point I shifted from using my imagination to solve problems to using my experience.
My call to action with this blog is to encourage you to challenge yourself to overcome imposter syndrome and not dwell on mistakes. Making mistakes is how we learn but do the best with what resources you have at the time. Do not compare yourself to someone else who does not have your story and experiences. Think about the skills you have, the things you like to do, and the things that you may think are so easy that everyone must see things the same way. I guarantee most people do not. Pick up the book Strengths Finder and take the Gallup Assessment to identify your top talent themes—and then take this idea of strengths farther. When you see someone excel at something, compliment them. Call those strengths out. If you have children or are around children, share your observations or even memories of where they show their talents and strengths. When you are faced with a challenge in an area that you are not as strong in, its ok to ask for help. Tap into other’s strengths.
Go be brave.
I highly recommend Ina Garten’s book, Be Ready When the Luck Happens. Ina is also known as The Barefoot Contessa, and I love watching her cooking shows. She is so personable you feel like you are right there in her kitchen with her. In this book, Ina shared her struggle with self-esteem stemming from a difficult childhood. She shares how she grew into her confidence, talents, and trusting her instincts to lean into a career doing what she loves with the encouragement of a strong support network, especially her husband.
A few weeks ago on my commute, I came across a Will Ferrell interview discussing his early comedy career days. He shared a story of when he first joined the Saturday Night Live cast, he was also filming or had filmed movies such as Old School, Anchorman and Elf. At that time, he was not confident the movies, which now have become iconic, would be picked up by producers or even released. Although Will has become an entertainment superstar, he reflected that he flubbed his very first line on SNL on live television. It is crazy to me that he has achieved so much success, he still clearly remembers that one mistake on SNL.
In the “We Are the World” The Greatest Night in Pop documentary, music icons such as Lionel Riche, Huey Lewis, Cyndi Lauper were interviewed about the event. The artists shared as much as they were honored to be part of the project because of the mission, the pressure to perform solos while being also being filmed for the music video was immense with so many successful artists in the same room.
Hearing that these talented people who are household names struggle with imposter syndrome, making mistakes, self-confidence, and their perceived weaknesses is something a lot of us also struggle with also. I especially hear this often from women who doubt and downplay their gifts or constantly compare themselves to others.
Thinking of my own childhood, report card time was stressful. It did not matter how much I may have excelled in some areas, any subjects that showed marks of average or needs improvement were scrutinized. Growing up, the focus was traditionally on my weaknesses and what I could do better, not my strengths. I realize that constructive criticism can be helpful but ultimately, we cannot all be good at everything. We all have different strengths that make us unique. We should appreciate them and share these strengths and talents.
If you have not taken the Gallups Strengths Finder, this is an excellent assessment to invest in. Through answering a series of questions, your top 5 strengths are identified. My top 5 are Intellection, Discipline, Empathy, Learner, and Focus. A friend and fellow consultant is certified in the Gallup Assessments for coaching her clients. I asked her thoughts about how early strengths start appearing and she said strengths can begin showing as early as elementary school ages. Gallup does offer a survey instrument called Strengths Explorer for 3rd to 8th grade students that although is not the full 50 strength topics in the adult assessment, this will identify the top 3 out of 10 talents.
So, I was curious. Knowing my strengths through the Gallup assessment as an adult, what if I looked at my old report cards and transcripts and possibly job evaluations through a different perspective? I still have some school report cards and mementos in storage from my elementary through college days. What areas or subjects did I excel in? What positive comments did my teachers say about my skills? How does that feedback line up with my known strengths as an adult?
My report cards showed I always earned great grades in Reading, English, Social Studies, Spelling, Science and Art. I was not so strong in Math, Accounting, Chemistry and Handwriting. What was most interesting though were the teachers comments. I had challenges listening to and following directions. I daydreamed often. I should proof my work and make more effort to turn in neat work. Even more interesting were comments that I put too much pressure on myself, I should not be afraid to make mistakes, I worked well independently, and that I struggled with self-confidence and self-esteem. Some of these are still true today.
In high school and college, I had earned several scholarships and awards for outstanding new member, achievement, loyalty and leadership in the groups and teams I was part of. In a 1998 DISC profile through my work, I was a high S for Steadiness-cooperating with others to carry out tasks and C for Conscientiousness, working within circumstances to ensure quality and accuracy. I was very low in D for Dominance and I for Influence. The recommendation for any of my managers was that I would work best in an environment where I knew expectations, had documented procedures, and was aware of how I would be evaluated so I could ensure I met my goals.
Wow…. Spot. On. When I reflect on what motivates me, I always need a goal to work toward--either a milestone, mission, or some sort of inventive to earn such as a bonus. I am not motivated by recognition. I hate the spotlight but still want to be a leader in my actions. I am still observant and want to be transparent about goals and expectations but strive to be diplomatic. I like dealing with facts, processes, and documentation, although as I get older, I am learning to lean into my intuition much more. I love to learn and although I do like to know expectation boundaries, I also like to know where I can be creative and add my own stamp to my work. I miss using my imagination and being creative. I wonder at one point I shifted from using my imagination to solve problems to using my experience.
My call to action with this blog is to encourage you to challenge yourself to overcome imposter syndrome and not dwell on mistakes. Making mistakes is how we learn but do the best with what resources you have at the time. Do not compare yourself to someone else who does not have your story and experiences. Think about the skills you have, the things you like to do, and the things that you may think are so easy that everyone must see things the same way. I guarantee most people do not. Pick up the book Strengths Finder and take the Gallup Assessment to identify your top talent themes—and then take this idea of strengths farther. When you see someone excel at something, compliment them. Call those strengths out. If you have children or are around children, share your observations or even memories of where they show their talents and strengths. When you are faced with a challenge in an area that you are not as strong in, its ok to ask for help. Tap into other’s strengths.
Go be brave.